These Shoes

July 21, 2008 at 3:31 pm (blogging, myself & I, opinions, rambling, real life, reflecting)

I know it’s been forever since I last updated, and I apologize. It’s summer time, and I tend to get lost in this season of freedom and relaxation. I have not been around to update you all on how my first doctors appointment went, and for this I am deeply sorry. I know you have been awaiting a response, and next time I fall off the face of the earth please feel free to email me and yell at me.

Anyways, the appointment ended up with me waiting for a surgery date – which I’m still waiting for. They are operating on my left ankle and left ring finger. Since having the appointment, other issues and concerns have come up; like the tumour on the underside of my left hip. It’s getting larger and causing more discomfort and pain. I’ve called my doctor and left a message about possibly including that in the operation, but unfortunately the lady behind the desk told me I would have to have an appointment with him so he could check it out. He can’t just add things to his list because he has other patients. It makes sense, I guess. So ya, I’m just waiting on a surgery date.

Other than the wait, not much has happened in my medical life. So I can get on to the “dirty” part of this post.

I received an email that someone had commented a post in my old MHE blog Bumpy Bones. Here is the comment they left (that I haven’t approved because I no longer log in to Bumpy Bones):

Author : anonymus
E-mail : nzundel@weber.edu
URL :
Comment:
-As a survivor of cancer, mulitiple surgeries, scars and lifetime effects of REAL medical conditions. . .All I can say is- get over yourself- Life is too short to get that worked up over a miniscule “reminder” that you are human- and life happens- Everyone had little odd things about them- and if attention to them brings you that much distress- you should be seeing a shrink=- not a surgeon! My praises to the surgeon that had enough perspective to tell you the truth in todays world of scalpel happy nuts.

Personally, I thought this to be very harsh so I decided to email this person a reply, only apparently the email they gave doesn’t exist, so I decided to post it here in case they still happen to be reading. Here is my reply:

Dear “Anonymous”;
In regards to the comment you left on my Bumpy Bones Website, I would just like to take the time to say that while I do respect you for being a cancer survivor, but would like to remind you that there are other people in the world who go through medical conditions every day for all of their lives. My MHE is something that I have to live with every day of my life, and there is no beating it. Before you wrote that comment, you should have looked into my medical condition; all of my bone tumours are inactive cancer, they can become active at any given moment. Consider I have these growths ALL OVER MY BODY, that makes my risk higher than people who don’t have this disorder. All of my scars have a great risk of getting skin cancer, which is why I wanted to get the bigger ones removed. I did NOT want my scars removed for purely cosmetic reasons, which is why I took offence to the doctors words. I merely wanted them removed to lessen the risk of cancer and because a lot of those scars cause pain.
My medical conditions are just as REAL as yours were, and I find it extremely rude of you to accuse me of other wise. You of all people should realize that you can NEVER see how hard a person has it or doesn’t have it until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes. You haven’t walked a mile in mind, so please keep your petty comments to yourself. Yes, I do have some body issues but I do not need a shrink to tell me that, I’m fully aware it could be worse and I don’t sulk about my medical issues. I live with them them. I battle the depression that walks hand in hand with having a chronic illness.
I hope you feel good about yourself for this comment, I hope you got out all your angst in this comment.
Truthfully, I was and am upset about this anonymous person’s comment. I know I shouldn’t let one person’s opinion bother me, but it hurts that most people think that just because your disorder/illness doesn’t have a gigantic charity or a ribbon, it makes it less real than say cancer. My MHE may not have a gigantic, world known charity to raise awareness and money for research, and nor does it have a ribbon (at least as far as I know), but that doesn’t mean my medical condition is any less real than anyone else’s. It’s chronic, it causes a lot of pain and other conditions, and its a part of my life. No, it does not define me, but it is a part of me.
So, anonymous commenter…I hope you read my response to your comment and I hope in the future you think twice before saying something like that to someone else.
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2 Comments

  1. Connie said,

    Glad to have you back with us! Sorry to hear about still waiting on a date for your surgery and then the possibility of more surgery. I’ve come to believe that doctors even specialists are not used to dealing with people who have chronic illnesses. There are rare exceptions but they are getting very hard to find.

    As for your anonymous commenter, this person is full of anger. No matter what you write, yell, explain, argue, debate, unless they let go of their anger there’s nothing anyone can do to change that outlook.

    I’ve had my share of hateful comments or replies to comments I’ve made. We are a much misunderstood group. I hope that you got to read Laurie Edwards book. She is trying to bridge the gap between us and “them”.

    Take care and I’ll remember to email & yell at you when you’re gone too long!

  2. Anonymous said,

    Hi, I’m not the anonymous commenter by the way, I just don’t feel comfortable about giving my real name online. Since having MHE does not always imply risks of actually losing the life, people tend to think that is less important than Cancer or AIDS and they keep telling you that you are after all, somehow, “normal” and “healthy”. Personally I don’t like to think that I’m sick all the time, I think I’m more than that. But it still haunts me sometimes, when I have to drop my plans because a new surgery comes along or when I can’t wear certain shoes because of the rare shape my feet haves. So I’m sorry about what that commenter said, sad for him that he thinks he’s better than you because he got over a medical history.

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