Differences

June 5, 2008 at 10:22 pm (blogging, myself & I, opinions, rambling, real life)

I had a conversation today with someone that sort of hurt my feelings/got me thinking. They asked why I hadn’t found a job yet, and I explained that I stopped looking because I’ll be having a surgery soon and I think it’s pointless to start a job if I’m just going to have to take a leave of absence/quit it for the surgery.

They thought that I should look anyway, because I could get a couple weeks in at the new job. I still think it would be rude to get a job, tell them I’m unable to work because I’ll be having a surgery, and then have them have to hire someone else. That’s if they hire me in the first place. Most places won’t hire you if they know you won’t be able to work solidly because it’s too much of a hassle. When my sister was looking for a job she had to tell every potential employer that she was getting married and going on a honeymoon for a couple of weeks. The places didn’t hire her because what’s the point in hiring someone who can’t work?

But still, this person hurt my feelings. They said that another person had been chatting with them about my job situation, and that they agree that I should get a job and work anyway. I was miffed at this point, and told them to walk a day in my shoes and come back with what they discovered. Of course, this angered them and the conversation ended. I was trying to get them to see it from my point of view; places don’t hire you unless they know you’ll be able to work the required term. Meaning if I was seeking summer full time employment, they would only hire me if I could work the entire summer full time. If I needed time off for a surgery, they wouldn’t hire me because they would just need to hire someone else to take over.

I find it difficult to explain myself to family and friends because I always feel like I’m just complaining by stating my opinion on things. Truthfully, I have been looking for a job and sending out resumes like crazy. Job Bank has been the top visited site by me in the last month. A lot of jobs require you to have transportation and I license – which I lack. This makes getting a job even more difficult. I was hoping the local retail store would hire me, but I haven’t heard back from them. I haven’t had much experience – or any actually – in retail. I have 2 years worth of experience in costumer service, but none in retail. This sort of puts a damper on applying at retail stores, who prefer it if you have retail experience.

So I’m stressed out about money, and about school. I still don’t have any clue what I’m going to do. I’m waiting to hear back about Office Admin, and I think the Journalism program I applied for and got accepted into has revoked their offer as I never replied back to them. Gah!

Anyways, I’m looking forward to next year. My pen pal, Mandy, and I are planning on actually getting together. I want to go visit her in her home town, because it’s apparently really nice there. I haven’t seen her since grade 7, so it would be nice to see her again.

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Back to Square One

June 5, 2008 at 3:08 am (blogging, myself & I, rambling, real life, reflecting, worries/concerns)

Now originally I had a lot to discuss in this post, however this page has literally taken 10 minutes to load and my back is already killing me. I don’t think I can make it as long as I had intended to, so we have dialup to thank for that! One day I will get high speed, one day. I don’t understand why they don’t just make high speed for rural areas in Canada. I know Bell has it available for the States. How hard is it to make it available for rural areas in Canada if it’s already available in the rural areas of the States?

Anyways, I’m rambling. I tend to do that when I’m sore…so yes, I ramble a lot. But anywho, I’m back to square one with the whole educational pursuit. Originally I had accepted the offer into the local community college for the Child and Youth Worker program. However I recently realized that although I would make a good, attentive Child and Youth Worker, I don’t have that mental strength that is required when being a Child and Youth Worker to put a line between work and home. When working with troubled children and youth, there is a risk that you might not always be able to help someone. Or their cases and situations are far too horrible. I definitely am not the kind of person who can leave that sort of thing in the office, I would surely bring everything home with me and that would definitely reek havoc on my family life and even mental health.

So now what? Well I’ve always wanted to do Journalism. It’s no surprise that I’m deeply passionate about writing (or at least I hope it’s no surprise!) and everything about the Journalism program appealed to me. Everything. There wasn’t one thing that I didn’t like! My dream job has always been to be a well known and well published writer, and I have several plot books and started novels to prove it!

Unfortunately, Journalism is now wait-listed. I’m now on the wait-list, and the Admissions Officer assured me that it had only recently been wait-listed, which means that there should only be a small handful of people on the list.

If I don’t get in to Journalism in September, then I do have a backup. I’ve applied for the February start of Office Administration, the same course that my sister Kate took. That job definitely leads to other branches that I could go in to, and there is money there. Although it wouldn’t be the job of my dreams it would still be something I wouldn’t despise doing.

So now all I can do is wait, and kick myself for being so indecisive and not knowing what I want and who I was earlier. I could have already accepted the Journalism offer and not be on the wait-list. Now I just have to wait and see, and keep my fingers crossed.

I’m still jobless; and haven’t even gotten a call back for any of the resumes I sent out 😦 it definitely kicks ya in the ego. I used to think I had an impressive resume! Now I guess it turns out I don’t really 😦

And in unrelated news, Matt’s birthday was yesterday and he said he had a blast. His mom took us both out for lunch at Kelsey’s, and it was pretty good. He loved his shoes that I bought him (and refuses them to wear them since they have more white than his last pair) and the little birthday dinner/cake party we throw for him also made his day. He got two cakes!! Yum. Lucky boy! Now my birthday is next; 11 more days! Then I will be 19! I’m looking forward to that, and to my weekend in London with my cousins and Matt. That should be fun too!

Unfortunately my back is aching something fierce so I’m going to go to bed early tonight since I left the really awesome back stuff Gordon gave me at Matt’s house 😦 I wanted Matt and Colleen to try it, because it definitely helped my muscles relax. I forget what it’s called; it’s sort of like Rub A535, but better…way better.

Hopefully the back pain medication my mom found will work tonight so I can get some sleep!

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On The Hunt – Again

June 3, 2008 at 4:31 am (blogging, myself & I, opinions, rambling, real life, reflecting, worries/concerns)

So during my last post – X-Rays and E-mails – I meant to talk about my doctors appointment and a really nice email I had received about my blog, however I got distracted by visitors and forget to mention the really nice email that really did make my day! In this email, I was told that my blog was very informative and that the person learned a lot about MHE just by reading it (among other things). This honestly perked me up a lot. It’s no secret that I haven’t exactly been feeling 100% myself. It surprised me just how much words like that could bring up my spirit. I tend to look at my own blog a wee bit more critically than I should, but its nice to know that I’m helping educate people 🙂

Today is my boyfriend’s birthday, so I’ll be busy all day hanging out with him. I’m going to cook him dinner and bake him a cake. I’m hoping to make his birthday special because his past birthday’s haven’t exactly been special. So today it will be all about him 🙂

My doctors office called me today with the appointment for the pre-op stuff. I have to fill out a bunch of forms and meet with the anesthesiologist. Matt is planning on coming with me. It’s very important to me that whoever I’m with isn’t terrified or intimidated by doctors appointments, and Matt definitely isn’t. He’s definitely a keeper; you can tell by the way he wants to know what we’re up against. Not to mention, in times of crisis he doesn’t run away. He’s there for me, giving the comfort of hugs and wise words. He’s also there for my family, which I have never seen in a guy I’ve dated before. Anyways, that doctors appointment is going to take place on June 16th – the day after my birthday. I guess I won’t be enjoying turning 19 on Sunday night. Heh. Oh well, I have the rest of my life to go to bars!

I also have to really get started on job hunting. I put in an application to a local retail store at the pathetically small mall in town, but haven’t heard back from them yet. Granted, I handed in my resume on the Friday. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that I get the job. I really need the money. Too bad now a days all the desk jobs require a degree of some sort of administrative program in college 😦 this makes getting a job very difficult!

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