Winter is Here.

December 13, 2007 at 5:30 pm (beginnings, blogging, endings, myself & I, rambling, real life)

I cannot believe that there are only 12 days until Christmas. I have not yet finished my Christmas shopping. I still need to buy stuff for the guy I am now seeing and a couple of my friends. Plus I still need to get something for a girl a work with (we did Secret Santa).

So. What is new in the life of JC? Tons of things. For instance…I have decided to not return for semester 2 of my program. It simply isn’t what I thought it would be; and the job opportunities are not plentiful. When I graduate, I will only be offered jobs in group homes and other such agencies. I was under the impression that I would get to work in any kind of group home, school, or hospital setting. I am also quitting my job at the group home so I can move to my cousin’s place.

I love the residents at the group home, and I am sad about leaving them on such short notice. But management is very hard to please and frankly, I’m tired of pushing myself to my breaking point and not getting barely anyrecognization for the stuff I do. My house manager is “disappointed in me” because I “let the kids down”. I took a shift for a girl I work with so she could attend the staff Christmas party – I wasn’t eventhinking about myself or my schooling, and I do have an exam at 4pm. The shift is from 4 until 8. Yes, I realize that I did commit to taking this girl’s shift, but in my rush to be such a peoplepleaser I put myself aside. I need to do this exam at 4pm today. I tried my hardest to find someone who would cover it, but nobody could. Everybody had something vitally important to do, and nobody could work at most 2 hours for me while I write my exam. So they are going to be running short for 2 hours, and it’s all my fault. And I’ve let down my house manager and the kids.

So since I disappointed my house manager and the kids enough, I guess handing in my two weeks notice won’t be a major disappointment. Apparently people at my work were mad at me for being late. I was late twice; both times were outside of my control. One of the times the highway was closed because of an accident, and weather was the result of the other time. I find my co-workers to be entirely too gossipy and catty. So I’ll resign.

I’m looking for a job around where my cousin lives. There are apparently a lot more group homes that pay better and treat their employees better, so I will look into that.

So there are a lot of changes that I will be going through for the next little while. I think last time I jumped into the idea of college too quickly, and when it wasn’t what I expected it to be I became isolated and felt let down. This time I am taking almost a year off. I’ll get more work experience and save up my money. Then I will get to go into either Child and Youth Work or Developmental Services Work, both courses are totally awesome and focusessouly around what I want to do with my future. I could work in school, group home, or hospital settings with a degree in both of those programs.

I am moving out of my apartment on December 31st. I am looking forward to this change; I haven’t been happy here.



  1. Girl, Dislocated said,

    About the disappointed house manager and the hard to please management: let them eat cake! You have to do what’s right for you. You’re not letting anyone down. While you worked there, you helped the kids, but you need to move on. No one should expect you to stay in a position or academic program that won’t allow you to accomplish your goals. The manager will just have to do her job as a manager and find someone to fill the position. It’s very simple really.

  2. Bennie said,

    The first comment said it best! Hard to add anything to it other than change is so often good for all of us. The worst thing to get yourself into is “a rut.” That can really pull you down into the doldrums of life.

  3. JC said,

    Girl, Dislocated; I suppose if I looked at it that way I wouldn’t feel so guilty!

    Bennie; yes, I really don’t want to end up in a rut. I’ve been in one before, and I had a hard time getting out!

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